Chapter 2: What do you think gets in your way?

I walked into Marigold's apartment, where we had agreed to meet and work through the Inner Compass Handbook together. It was time to confront my inner demons, something I'd been avoiding since, well, forever. Marigold handed me a notebook with excitement, and together we took a deep breath before starting the "Past Shame" exercise. My heart clenched when I saw the title, but I knew I had to dive in, to face the things that haunted me for so long.

With trepidation, I began scribbling furiously, digging into the recesses of my memories, unearthing my self-sabotaging habits and the "shoulds" that had shackled me. I wrote about the time I'd failed to bring home the coveted first prize in the school bake-off, the disappointment in my mother's eyes as she consoled me, "It's okay, sweetie. You tried your best." But it wasn't okay, was it? The weight of my past failures pressed down on me, suffocating me, but I didn't let it stop me. I clawed my way through the morass of regret, writing about the time I'd frozen on the high dive, my teammates' jeers echoing in my ears, and the crushing realization that I was never enough. My pen felt like a lifeline, a beacon of hope guiding me through the darkness. And as I wrote, I felt something inside me change, the murky depths of my soul beginning to clear. I knew I was letting go, releasing the burdens that had haunted me for so long. As we finished the exercises, a new sense of freedom washed over me, and I emerged from Marigold’s apartment a bit more ready to embrace the chaos of life.